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How Classy People Get Wasted*


Raise your hand if you've ever paired red wine with a cough drop?

No one? Bueller?

I just did. Right now. I wasn't even planning to write about that. But the combination is so horrifically awful I need to share it with someone other than the dogs and the husband.

Here's the deets - I'm still sick, I've got that cough that settles down into your lungs like the way Daisy settles for Tom at the end of the The Great Gatsby - I'm talking low, low down.

So, BW is making dinner and, like I've been known to do, I situate myself in my spectator chair and prepare to chat about our (ahem, my) days. He pours me a glass of pre-dinner wine (I read somewhere wine is good for a cold) and then goes about preparing the meal: fresh trout in a dill and garlic butter drizzle with a side of mashed potatoes. (I know, right??!!)

After chattering on about my day I ask about his, nodding appreciatively at his responses; pretend to smell my wine with my still stuffy nose, and laugh gaily at something one of the dogs is doing. After a moment, adrift in my post-work-pre-dinner haze, I go in for my first sip forgetting there is already a cough drop in my mouth.

And, end scene.

Needless to say, if you're looking for a menthol-esque eucalyptus experience with hints of cherry and red currant, followed by a light pectin film along the interior of your mouth with a bitter aftertaste - give it a go. I'm sure any cough drop will do. You won't be disappointed.


*This is an excerpt from my newsletter

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